Rules

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Say yes to every job, even if there is no money.

Say no when they ask to own all the publishing.

Stall when they ask you to agree to something you think is unfair because often they will cave to your terms from impatience of not getting their way fast.

If the contract says you must indemnify them for any losses incurred because of anything that you do not properly provide make sure to add a new clause stipulating they too must indemnify you if they fail to provide something they said they would but failed to.

If it’s a film and they aren’t paying you much (or anything) at least ask for your credit to be listed 2cnd or 3rd.

If they lie to your face just be cool, smile, finish the job before letting an asshole know that they are an asshole, if you even care to.

The Birds And The Bees

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I lived in the country near Hagersville in the 90s for 8 years and I had a bee problem. These types of bees burrowed about an inch into the wood frame of my place leaving a little sawdust pile on the ground. There were tons of them. I never got stung but I was careful. I liked the people I met in the country during those years someone always had a solution to every problem. One time a guy was helping me make a fence and he later told me about his friend Delbert who could cure my bee problem for $50.

“He’ll spray this spay and it’s completely green. Then you won’t have a bee problem.”

“It’s completely green?”

“Yes it has to be these days.”

“Are you sure it won’t effect the birds or cats or children?”

“Call Delbert. Yes it’s true and $50.”

This was hard to believe but I called Delbert. He was a very cheery guy and he was pleased to tell me all about this stuff called something like Foadle Spray. I couldn’t find anything on it online. Delbert said it was $50 and it only killed the bees nothing else. I called Greenpeace in Toronto because they have staff who would know about these things. When they called back and said they looked and there is no such thing as Foadle Spray – they left me with simple instructions, ask him what the active ingredient is.

“Hi Delbert it’s me again.”

“Nice to hear from you would you like to set up an appointment now?”

“Maybe I just have one last question about foadle spray. Could you tell me what is the active ingredient?”

Delbert’s cheery voice considerably changed as he slowly pronounced a word I couldn’t easily repeat. I asked him to spell it – hexachlorobenzene. Then online I read abut leukemia in children and pending lawsuits. Mind blowing that people could sell poison and call it green because that’s what consumers want to hear. It’s like imagining someone wanting to run the country to ensure greater profits for corporations and willing to punish critics, derail democratic process,  fire the nuclear safety watchdog & diminish environmental laws all the while nurturing an image of themselves as easy going nice guy because a substantial number of voters want to see a nice guy in power.

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A Chicken With Poison Interlaced With The Meat

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Work With Me Annie is a fabulous song. Banned for the sexual lyrics ..what a crazy footnote and there is an answer song by Etta James Roll With Me Henry. A bit interesting to watch Hank Ballard and Johnny Carson brought to us by Salem cigarettes in 1961.

Great idea to make answer songs. The one Paul McCartney wrote (Dear Friend) to John Lennon (How Do You Sleep) stands out emotionally.

Off the top of my head I would like to make an answer song for this Ween classic, from the point of view that I didn’t kill his brother, that he has it all wrong.

Buenas Tardes Amigo

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