Category Archives: War

guilty feelings

Friend overseas wrote to say she streamed my cd 3 times. According to her I probably earned a dollar in revenue. She is appreciative not stealing music, prefers streaming, wants to convey her pleasure and no guilty feelings and likes knowing I make money. That’s fine, making money is making money but it doesn’t have anything to do with making music. Awkward when people project onto me I am about being a cash register and just as awkward when judged for having made a dumb financial move, choosing to be an artist. Neither opinion has anything to do with the real point of it. Would the world really be pleased if Van Gogh and Bach quit earlier because sales didn’t prove their worth?

easy answer

My daughter spilled orange juice onto my Macbook last weekend. Who’s fault could it be but mine letting a 5 yr old watch a program on a computer with a tall glass of orange juice in her hands. Track pad soon became all whack-a-doodle, could not click on anything and the longer the computer remained on the more it started being controlled by invisible forces. Repair inquiries indicated $150 – $300.
 
Decided to take the plunge after reviewing fix-it tutorials on Youtube but more than one friend said
 
“I’ve never done that.”
 
“Are you crazy?”
 
“Don’t do it.”
 
“Have you ever done it before?”
 
Chickens, all chickens but the thing is, most of us (leaders of music projects) know we have to do everything ourselves, that’s how it is probably always will be. We book the shows, we pick up the band, sell the merch (nowadays I give it away), pay the gas, negotiate the door, negotiate the studio time, the schedules of others (insert infinity).
 
Very unlikely anyone ever gets to be Ron Sexsmith – gigging around the world and doesn’t know how to drive a car – astonishing. People drive him to and fro. It’s unnatural, it’s incredible. One in a million. If orange juice spills into his computer bet someone swoops down from the clouds and fixes it free, maybe it would even be me, “gimme that damn computer lemme at it with my 00phillips. There, done, your welcome”.
 
Sometimes interviewers throw a certain question out to me as though they are asking something nobody ever thought of before.
 
“Let me ask you something, in a perfect world what is it you want? A record deal? A movie deal? Produce a hit? Write a hit? A world tour?”
 
I know the answer to this question, it’s the easiest question ever invented in a world of difficult questions.
 
“Staff.”
 
 
 

New Age

Sensory deprivation was a thing people used to pay for. Floatation tanks. I signed up. Lying in a salt water tank in absolute darkness. Maybe this would be an exploration of consciousness of weightless …sightless ….soundless

As I paid for the session and prepared to go to my chamber the reception person asked if I wanted music. They offered a choice from 5 different New Age records to embellish the sensory deprivation experience.

to      embellish    the      sensory      d e p r i v a t i o n     experience.