musician: You mean when I signed this contract I gave them the right to use any of the music I wrote for any future project without paying me anything?
musician: I can’t believe it.
lawyer: Believe it.
musician: I didn’t think it was sensible to hire my own lawyer, they were offering so little. They said I would be doing them a favour.
lawyer: You did.
musician: I couldn’t justify hiring a lawyer to look it over.
lawyer: Next time you can hire me for one hour just to look it over and give you a summary.
lawyer: Like the Zen story.
musician: There’s a Zen story about residual rights?
lawyer: There was a monk who was pursued by a tiger and when he came to a cliff’s edge he lowered himself down the side to a strawberry bush while at the same time overhead the tiger waited drooling. Just before the branch that held his weight broke and he plunged to his death he plucked one strawberry and said while falling “this tastes delicious”.
musician: (slowly) So, become a monk? Stay away from tigers? Eat fruit?
lawyer: That’s why you call me next time.