now that i’ve worked many days in a row on the stride stuff it’s happening naturally. the left hand is frequently accurate and there’s no tracing, as far as i can tell how it improves, except through repetition. what’s confounding is trying to understand exactly what i’m repeating, because it’s like repeating a bungee jump, repeating the intentional entry into oblivion, repeating no control or at least controlling not in the way you can turn on the kettle, get dressed or park a car.

another memorable moment from zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance was when pirsig’s son has a hissy fit and walks away from the campsite. the other two contemporaries, discuss his son and he introduces the fact that the boy recently was diagnosed as having mental illness which disconcerts them. one asks what do you suppose is the cause behind his problems to which he answers he doesn’t know. then adds, cause and effect doesn’t seem to fit, cause and effect are about thinking and i would think mental illness comes before thought, he concludes. whatever my hands are doing comes before thought and it’s sick.