I went to the hospital to say goodbye to Jeff Burke. It was after nine pm. His daughter gave me the password and the nurse directed me to his room. She said there would be another nurse inside. There was.
He was a man in his late thirties who didn’t speak English very well. He was adjusting the fluids feeding Jeff through the tube in his mouth. Jeff was unconscious. Near the bed, a cellphone was playing bad modern pop music. Brittle drum machines, synthetic strings, a sound that keeps insisting on itself. In the elevator a few minutes earlier, it occurred to me if Jeff was unconscious, which I assumed he was, I would play some Keith Jarrett. We shared that love. Now the idea was ruined by the cruel cell phone pretending badly to be music.
I touched his wrist, told him who I was, how much I admired him, that I would check in on Julie-Ann and Seren. I was about to leave when I thought I could do more. Pressed the side of the cellphone. The screen lit up. A pause button! I pressed it. Silence. A man admired for his classical music, his jazz, his free improvisations, his penny whistles and theremin solos set against bassoon loops, should not spend final times listening to the loud and meaningless. Another layer of cruelty.
I held my phone near his ear and played the Köln Concert, all of side one. If, in the scheme of things, he could hear any of it, this was fitting. If his mind still received sound with any degree of consciousness, it might register familiarity, coherence, maybe even a sense of peace which music offers differently than spoken words.
The nurse returned. I felt obliged to explain why I seem to be doing yoga with phone near the friend’s ear. He seemed surprised to learn Jeff was a great musician. I hope that alters something small but important like how he is held, how he is spoken to, how he is treated.
So long. I hope the coda bearable.
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Hi There Bob!
Thank you SO enormously much for this
beautifully profound & eloquent story of
your magnificent, lovely goodbye to my
precious, immensely LOVED💜 Huny Jeff!
It’s tremendously moving, hearttouching &
absolutely spectacular ALL the MANY, MANY
comments on social media, the countless
fabulous stories people are telling of cherished
times with my dearest Jeff, treasured memories
& just how MANY 100’s & 100’s, if not 1000’s of
people my precious Jeff had left a special moment,
smile, memory, kindness, given help to with his
phenomenal talented musical abilities & skills!!
There NEVER had been someone like my Jeff before
nor will there ever be again!
We were ALL SO incredibly Blessed for having had this friendly, caring, empathetic, gentle, extraordinarily kind, effervescent, jovial & extremely fun/ funny man in our lives! As countless people have stated ……. my dear precious, beautiful Huny Jeff
definitely made our world a much better place with him it!!
Now, the world w/o my Jeff is dimmer, quieter, much less humorous, with far far less hugs – the REALLY good ones my dear Jeff bestowed on just about everyone. Anyone who was fortunate enough to get a *Jeff hug* was left feeling terrific & smiling afterwards!
Despite music being his lifelong pursuit & biggest source of enjoyment, anyone who knew Jeff could
tell you that he always felt his #1 source of pride, his biggest accomplishment in LIFE, was his beautiful, beloved💚 daughter Seren! Jeff completely adored her with his whole heart. Frequently he would tell anyone who would listen, all of Seren’s
great achievements & successes.
My Jeff TOTALLY loved💚 ALL of his family SO very much! Especially his dear Mom & his 2 very talented, skilled, lovely sisters too.
A constant enthusiastic interest of Jeff’s was trying to trace his family tree🌳 & history.
I do NOT think I will EVER be able to recover from my horribly broken, sad & shattered heart💜 from losing the LOVE of my life! But, I have a plethora of 21 really happy, magnificent, Blessed, priceless years with my cherished, treasured, one of a kind, phenomenal man known by MANY names. Duffy,
JB, Jeff, Jeffrey, Black Santa, Jefferson, but to me??
He was & will always forever BE – my Huny Jeff!
“Eternal Rest grant into him dear Lord, may his Perpetual Light 🕯 shine upon him & may be forever rest in the Peace 🕊 of Paradise in Heaven for
all of Eternity!”
I will LOVE 💜 you endlessly, my precious, dear, Huny Jeff!
Always & Forever
Your Juliann😊 & our purrrecious QTPiee 🐾🐾💙 too!