In certain praying mantis relationships, the female is approached by the male, who has evidently received no briefing whatsoever. He climbs onto her with romance in his heart and perhaps a Barry White record in the shrubbery. She turns around, bites off his face and eats his brain. Then she mates with what remains of him, since the necessary machinery continues operating briefly under what biologists call reflex and married people call momentum. The male praying mantis has achieved something rare in nature: both husband and dinner without changing clothes.

Scientists describe this as sexual cannibalism, which makes it sound like a government program with special stationery. The female receives nutrition. The male passes along his genes. Everyone benefits, apart from the male, who is unavailable for comment. There is no end to the mysteries and madness of life in the universe. People continue asking whether aliens exist on other planets. They organize conferences, build telescopes and request billions of dollars to search distant galaxies for creatures unlike anything we have ever imagined.

Why go to all that trouble considering we already share the planet with an insect that eats her boyfriend’s head and then completes the romantic portion of the evening with his automated remains. If that does not qualify as Alien, the standards have become unreasonable. This is why I never questioned Sun Ra admitting he came from Saturn. Compared with the praying mantis, Saturn was the conservative explanation.