Kozmo said do you see that birch tree? Yes answered Thelma. It might seem like a single tree, you could think of it like that, we could call that tree Sally Birch, there she is, just Sally Birch the birch tree but below Sally Birch are roots which travel just as deep underground as are her branches above. So to see Sally Birch more clearly means to understand her canopy in the sky is as big and wide as the roots below. Hmmm replied Thelma. But you know Sally was born from the Earth like all the other trees and shrubs and grasses…so, we could say there is no single Sally, she’s just one of many things alive, sprouting from the Earth, equally connected to the Earth, yes? Yeah replied Thelma. All appear single but none of them are, just co-existing. So when you said you think other people play saxophone better than you and that you’re losing your mind, wishing you were better but no amount of effort seemed to change it, and when you said you’re scared one day you’ll die in that state, forever struggling with feelings of inadequacy, you should stop and consider that people all around, are trying to improve themselves. Like all of them trudge along with feelings of inadequacy. The book stores are always selling books about how to fix your body, how to fix your mind, how to fix your house. Everybody seems to think they need to fix various parts of how they are positioned in life. It might be that your state of worry is something not unique to you. It might be that you are part of something being done all over all the time and if you see that you might wonder how could a tree ever actually be the separate tree it appears to be. You and your apparent worries might be in the same boat. You might only be seeing part of what you are and not the whole thing. Maybe focus on trying to play well instead of focussing on how much you aren’t achieving an imaginary position.